I had my 2 pet rabbits from my friend whose rabbits had babies since October last year. I’ve been an animal lover my whole life and I love my pets so much. I had two rabbits; one that looked like a panda, and one that looked like a wild bunny (brown with a white tummy).

Early on in January, my dad forgot to close the side gate and one of my rabbits got out. I spent 40 minutes looking and eventually found my rabbit and brought him home. Again in early March, my rabbit bit a hole in the fence, the same gate that he got out from in January. This time, i spent more than an hour searching and chasing him until i chased him back home. (Both escapes were by the same wild looking rabbit).

The next morning, my mum was fixing the fence and stupidly let the rabbits run in the garden whilst doing so and this time BOTH bunnies escaped from the hole. Eventually, they came back themselves.

After fixing the fence, the day after my brown bunny ran away again. To this day, i still don’t know how he got out: I wired the fence and blocked all small areas with bricks and wood. I stuck up posters, looked everyday after school for an hour or two until my feet got blisters, but i couldn’t find him. I feel guilty because when i first discovered he ran away, i thought he would come back himself as he did the day before. After searching for weeks and looking at the pounds, all i got was one phone call from a lady that spotted him 4 days beforehand. By then he had gotten far away and there was no hope for finding him.

I got over him running away around a month after, but even now 3 months later I randomly break down and start crying uncontrollably. I feel as if its all my fault and that i should be punished.

Is it normal that I feel this way and will i ever fully get over my pet?